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From the Blog

What to Talk About in Therapy

Are you feeling lost or uncertain about what to talk about during therapy sessions? You’re not alone. Many individuals struggle with knowing what to say or discuss with their therapist. However, therapy sessions are a safe space where you can explore various topics and emotions freely. In this blog, we explore why finding topics to talk about in therapy is hard and identify topics to help you make the most out of your therapy sessions.

Why Finding Things to Talk About in Therapy is Hard

Finding topics to discuss in therapy can present significant challenges, particularly for anxious overachievers who may feel pressure to excel in all aspects of their lives. Let’s delve deeper into why this struggle occurs and explore strategies for determining what to talk about during therapy:

Fear of Judgment:

The fear of being judged or misunderstood by the therapist looms large for many individuals. This fear can stem from a worry that their thoughts and feelings will be deemed unacceptable or abnormal. Anxious overachievers, in particular, may be especially sensitive to perceived criticism, making it daunting to open up about personal struggles and discuss what to talk about during therapy..

Uncertainty About Relevance:

Deciding what to talk about during therapy can feel like navigating a maze without a map. Individuals may grapple with questions of relevance, wondering if their experiences or concerns are significant enough to merit discussion. This uncertainty can lead to hesitation and reluctance to broach certain topics during therapy sessions.

Emotional Expression Challenges:

Expressing emotions can be akin to navigating uncharted territory, particularly for those unaccustomed to discussing their feelings openly. Anxious overachievers, who may be more accustomed to intellectual pursuits than emotional exploration, may find it especially challenging to articulate their emotions in therapy settings and discuss what to talk about during therapy. This difficulty in emotional expression can hinder effective communication with the therapist.

Avoidance of Painful Topics:

Therapy often involves confronting painful or uncomfortable topics from the past or present. Anxious overachievers, seeking to maintain control and avoid vulnerability, may instinctively shy away from discussing these distressing subjects. This avoidance can be driven by a fear of experiencing intense emotional discomfort or re-traumatization, further complicating the process of finding topics and what to talk about during therapy.

Pressure to Perform:

Anxious overachievers are no strangers to the pressure to excel and impress. This pressure may extend to the therapy setting, where individuals may feel compelled to perform or present themselves in a certain light. The fear of disappointing the therapist or falling short of expectations can create anxiety and inhibit authentic communication, making it challenging to engage in meaningful dialogue during therapy sessions.

Lack of Self-Awareness:

Some individuals may struggle with self-awareness, making it difficult for them to identify and articulate their thoughts, feelings, and needs. Anxious overachievers, accustomed to focusing on external achievements, may have limited insight into their internal experiences. This lack of self-awareness can hinder their ability to pinpoint what to talk about during therapy, limiting their progress in addressing important issues.


Perfectionistic tendencies can cast a shadow over the therapeutic process, as individuals may harbor unrealistic expectations of themselves and their progress in therapy. Anxious overachievers, in particular, may feel compelled to have everything figured out and to present themselves as flawless and in control. This perfectionism can create immense pressure and detract from the authenticity and vulnerability necessary for meaningful therapeutic work.

What to Talk About In Therapy

Exploring various aspects of your life in therapy can lead to profound insights and personal growth. Here’s what to talk about during therapy, focusing on key areas that can help you address and work through important issues during therapy sessions.:

Personal Relationships:

Our connections with others shape our lives in profound ways. Therapy provides a space to unpack the complexities of your relationships, whether with family, romantic partners, friends, or colleagues. Delve into communication challenges, conflicts, or feelings of loneliness and isolation that may be impacting your relationships. Your therapist offers a supportive environment to explore these dynamics, providing valuable insights and techniques to improve your relationships and foster a stronger social support network.

Emotional Well-being:

Your emotional well-being is the cornerstone of your mental health. In therapy, one of the most important aspects is discussing what to talk about during therapy, including openly sharing your emotions, from stress and anxiety to depression and anger. By honestly expressing how you’re feeling and identifying triggers that affect your mood, you empower yourself to take charge of your emotional health. Your therapist can guide you in developing coping strategies and emotional regulation techniques to manage difficult feelings effectively, fostering resilience and inner peace.

Self-Exploration and Identity:

Therapy serves as a journey of self-discovery and understanding. Engage in deep conversations about your identity, values, beliefs, and aspirations. Explore fundamental questions about who you are, what you want, and what gives your life meaning and purpose. Through introspection and dialogue with your therapist, you gain clarity and confidence in your sense of self, paving the way for personal growth and fulfillment by discussing things to talk to your therapist about.

Past Trauma or Painful Experiences:

Past traumas and painful experiences can cast long shadows over our lives, impacting our mental health and well-being. It’s essential to confront and process any unresolved issues or traumas from your past in therapy. Whether it’s childhood experiences, relationship traumas, or major life events, your therapist provides a safe and supportive space for healing and growth. Together, you work through the pain, fostering resilience and reclaiming your sense of agency.

Goals and Progress:

Therapy is not just about reflection; it’s also about action and progress. Use your therapy sessions to set meaningful goals and track your journey towards personal growth and fulfillment. Whether you’re striving to overcome challenges, make lifestyle changes, or cultivate new habits, your therapist serves as a guide and ally. By discussing what to talk to your therapist about, setting realistic goals and developing actionable plans, you empower yourself to create positive change in your life. Regularly reviewing your progress in therapy fosters motivation and a sense of accomplishment, reinforcing your resilience and commitment to self-improvement.

Wondering what to discuss in therapy?

At Uncover Mental Health Counseling, we recognize that starting conversations in therapy can sometimes feel daunting. But rest assured, our team is here to support you every step of the way in discussing what to talk about during therapy. Set up a free 15 minute consultation and we’ll dig deeper with you. Here are some helpful suggestions to guide your discussions:

  • Begin with your current challenges: Share what’s been on your mind lately, whether it’s stress at work, relationship issues, or feelings of anxiety.
  • Reflect on your emotions: Dive into how you’ve been feeling emotionally, such as sadness, anger, or confusion, and explore the underlying causes.
  • Explore your past experiences: Delve into your personal history and how it may be influencing your present thoughts and behaviors.
  • Discuss your goals: Talk about what you hope to achieve through therapy and any changes you’d like to make in your life.
  • Consider your relationships: Explore your connections with others, including family dynamics, friendships, and romantic relationships.

Remember, therapy is a collaborative process, and your therapist is here to help you navigate through these discussions with compassion and understanding. You’re in a safe space to explore your thoughts and feelings openly, without judgment. Get in touch with a therapist in NYC today!

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